5 mistakes made by first-timers in Japan
One of the main questions that ex-pats in Japan are often asked is simply this: "Why Japan?"
And, truth be told, most of us just shrug our shoulders and give some sort of trite answer like: "The food here sure is delicious!" Or, depending on the temperament of the audience: "The women here sure are beautiful!"
You get the picture....
As for me, I've always argued that the real appeal of Japan is simply that it's an incredibly interesting country to explore. Even after living here for more than five years, and spending literally thousands of hours jumping over the linguistic hurdles of Japanese grammar, I still suffer from a fair bit of culture shock on a day-to-day basis.
You see, I guess that's really the gist of why Japan is so appealing to foreigners like myself. No matter how hard you try to assimilate, there will always be more challenges to overcome, especially if you want to penetrate the heart of one the world's most closed societies. Simply put, life in Japan is anything but boring.
Of course, there are dozens of cultural landmines that must be dodged on a daily basis here. And on that note, I present to you today five mistakes made by first-timers in Japan.
1) There is no word for no.
Japanese has something of a steep learning curve (to say the least!). Of course, one thing you'd better learn if you want to survive here is that there is no word for no. Yes can mean no, maybe most likely means no, but saying no directly pretty much informs those around you that you have about as much social grace as a bovine.
2) Be mindful of your footwear.
The Japanese don't take kindly to foreigners who forget to take off their shoes when entering private spaces. Use the slippers - that's why they're there - though be mindful that no two pairs of slippers are created equal. After all, the Japanese especially don't take kindly to foreigners who walk through the kitchen in toilet slippers.
3) Go easy on the ramen.
I love ramen. You probably love ramen. And yes, the ramen in Japan is damned near the food of the gods. But seriously, after eating the stuff three times a day for a week on end, your gastrointestinal system will start to hate you. Assuming you haven't figured out what toilet slippers look like, this can quickly become a serious problem.
4) Learn how to use chopsticks.
At your local cheap Chinese restaurant in North America, there's a good chance that a fork and knife are always on hand. However, this doesn't mean that this convenient culinary option is readily available in Japan. Although you might not be the most dexterous diner in the restaurant, you'll look like an overgrown child until you indulge in the fine art of Zen chopstick mastery.
5) Don't date club girls.
If there is one bit of advice that I can impart to you now, it's to never date club girls. Yes, women in Japan are beautiful, and yes, they do tend to be attracted to foreigners. However, keep in mind that just because they have a cute and smiling face, doesn't mean that they're all-together innocent. If a girl you meet in a club speaks fluent English, is decked out in designer labels, and keeps reaching for your wallet, steer clear! Chances are that she's been around the block a few dozen times, which means you're just moments from getting fleeced. Trust me - she's not the one you want to bring home to meet mom!
As this list can go on and on and on, feel free to chime in with your own words of wisdom for new arrivals in Japan!(www.gadling.com)
5 mistakes made by first-timers in Japan
Japanese Greetings
Japanese Greetings
(1) Ohayou gozaimasu. おはようございます。 (Good morning.) One can also say just "Ohayou（おはよう）". This is casual, and should not be used with one's boss.
(2) Konnichiwa. こんにちは。 (Hello/Good afternoon.)
(3) Konbanwa. こんばんは。 (Good evening.)
(4) Oyasuminasai. おやすみなさい。 (Good night.)
Unlike English, it is mostly used before going to bed.
(5) Sayonara. さよなら。 (Good-bye.) "Sayounara（さようなら)" can be also used instead of "sayonara（さよなら)."
People do not say "sayonara（さよなら）" when leaving their own home. tekimasu（いってきます）" is normally used. The response to "Ittekimasu（いってきます）" is "Itterasshai（いってらっしゃい）".
"Dewa mata（ではまた）" is also often used as "see you later", similar to the English expression.
How about "See you tomorrow"? "Tomorrow" is "ashita（明日）" in Japanese. I think you can guess what the the answer is: "Mata ashita（また明日）".
"Mata raishuu（また来週）". This means "See you next week".
by Namiko Abe : Japanese about
Japanese basic manner for everyday living (日本)
Japanese basic manner for everyday living (日本)
It is polite to put "-san" after anothers name, or "-chan" after a young girls name, or "-kun" after a boy's name, but NEVER use these after your own.
Never enter a house with your shoes. Slippers are usually provided in the entrance hall. If slippers are provided for the toilet, use them instead of the one for the rest of the house.
When you are invited into a Japanese family, bring a small present or "omiyage" (souvenir, usually food). If you are coming straight from your country, it is preferable to bring some local culinary specialties from your home town/region.
Say "o-jama shimasu" (sorry for disturbing) while entering someone's house.
Refrain from blowing your nose in front of other people. Japanese only use paper tissue for this. Like in other Asian countries, it is considered rude to blow you nose in a handkerchief and stuff it in your pocket afterward.
You should not eat while standing or walking in the street. Even inside a house, you should sit down to eat. The only exceptions are for eating at a counter (e.g. ramen) or for eating an ice-cream in the street.
Do not point your finger, feet or chopsticks at people. If you have to indicate an object or direction to someone, wave your fingers with the palm downwards.
It's polite to initially refuse someone's offer of help. Japanese may also initially refuse your offer even if they really want it. Traditionally an offer is made 3 times. It may be better to state you'll carry their bag, call a taxi, etc., instead of pushing them to be polite and refuse.
Japanese often compliment eachother to promote good will, but it is polite to deny how well you speak Japanese, how nice you look, etc
Avoid being expressing your opinion too directly. Japanese have what they call "honne" (real opinion) and "tatemae" (public opinion). They will express the latter in most situation so as not to disturb the group harmony. It is of course flexible and consist in agreeing with the people around you as much as possible. This is the reason why Japanese are so bad at debating serious issues in public (including the media). "Honne" is what you really think but do not say openly, or only to close friends or relatives.
Avoid interrupting people when they are speaking or thinking about an answer. Japanese do not mind short periods of silence in the middle of a discussion.
Avoid fixing someone in the eyes (for men, even, or especially beautiful girls sitting in front of you in the train).
Money should be given in an envelope, but only about half the Japanese really take the trouble. Most men do not seem to care, except for formal situations. Never forget this rule for weddings. In addition, the number of banknotes given to the married couple should be a odd number, as superstitious people believe that the couple might separate if the number can be divided in two.
How To Eat Japanese food (日本)
How To Eat Japanese food (日本)
To eat side dishes, you don't need to lift plates or bowls. Cut large pieces of food into small pieces with your chopsticks and move to your mouth.
To eat from large serving plates, you may use the clean top ends of your chopsticks to pick food to your own bowl or plate, if serving chopsticks are not available.
To eat sashimi (raw fish slices), mix wasabi (Japanese horseradish) into soy sauce in a small plate and dip sashimi pieces in the sauce. If you like wasabi, put wasabi directly on sashimi slices and dip in soy sauce to eat.
To eat tempura, dip it in tempura dipping sauce.
To eat sushi, clean your hands at first. Pick up nigiri-zushi (hand-pressed sushi) between your thumb and the index finger and the middle finger. Dip the end of the topping (not sushi rice side) in soysauce and bring the sushi to your mouth. It's good to eat the whole piece all at once if you can.
Japanese gifts exchange manner (日本)
Japanese gifts exchange manner (日本)
Gift exchange is a time-honored, popular tradition in Japan. It is regarded much more important than it is in the West. Among various types of gift a money gift may be unique and peculiar.
A money gift indicates affection, appreciation, respect or condolence. The amount is greater in proportion to the closeness of your relationship.
It should be presented in a special envelope (No-shi-bukuro), wrapped in a correct manner. No-shi-bukuro can be easily found at any stationary shop, department store, or even at Seven Eleven (Please be sure to choose the right No-shi-bukuro, depending on the nature of the gift related to the occasions).
Write your name on the backside of the envelope, using a Japanese brush-type pen. When you are well informed with HOW-TO offer a monetary gift you may avoid embarrassing situations in Japanese social life.
Wedding Ceremony
When you are invited to the wedding ceremony you should bring "Go-shu-gi" on the day and hand it to the person at the reception.
If you are a family, relative of the couple you should sent a gift either before of after the ceremony, not on the very day.
The appropriate amount of "Go-shu-gi" may vary according to the area, your age, your social status and the relationship between you and the couple.
The money has to be new bills.
Money gift: Go-shu-gi
Average amount: 10,000 yen to 100,000 yen
No-shi-bukuro: Kotobuki, Go-ke-kkon-o-iwai, O-iwai
MizuhikiColor: Red & white, or gold & silver
MizuhikiStyle: Musubi-kiri, Awaji-musubi
Funeral Service
You should offer Ko-den to either O-tsu-ya (wake) or O-so-shiki (funeral service) and hand it at the reception.
The appropriate amount of Ko-den may vary according to the area, your age, your social status and the relationship between you and the deceased.
Money gift: Ko-den
Average amount: 5,000 to 50,000 yen
No-shi-bukuro: Go-rei-zen,Go-butsu-zen, (No-shi should not be attached).
MizuhikiColor: Black and white, silver
MizuhikiStyle: Musubi-kiri, Awaji-musubi
Giving a Birth
If you are a family, relative or close friend of a newly becoming mother you shall give Shu-ssan-iwai.
You should offer a gift present as well, which would be more intimate and appreciated.
Money gift: Shu-ssan-iwai
Average amount: 5,000 yen to 10,000 yen
No-shi-bukuro: O-iwai
MizuhikiColor: Red & white
MizuhikiStyle: Cho-musubi
Visiting Someone at the Hospital
Cash token of sympathy can be handed in O-mi-mai No-shi-bukuro.
Alternatively you can bring some fruits, flower basket or send a get-well card
(Be aware that there are several types of flower that should no be chosen.).
Or you may offer both.
Money gift: O-mi-mai
Average amount: 10,000 yen
No-shi-bukuro: O-mi-mai, Iwai-on-zen-kai,
Mizu-gashi-ryo: O-kuda-mono-ryo , White envelope shall be accepted, too.
MizuhikiColor: Red & white
MizuhikiStyle: Musubi-kiri
Communicate in assertive manner
Communicate in assertive manner
2. Maintain eye contact naturally and comfortable for both of you but don't outstare a person.
3. Keep your body posture alert and confident.
4. Make gestures which give a sense of warmth and openness on your behalf.
5. Mean what you say.
Don't go back on promises or firm statements.
6.Learn to be comfortable with silence and use pauses to main effect to let the other person digest what you have just said.
7.Always know what you want. Keep this goal in mind and don't sway.
8. Always Speak clearly.
9.Don't swear (curse) or talk rudely in tone.
10.If you feel tears or anger coming on, breathe very deeply from the stomach - and pull back in.
11.Do not speak too loud or too soft.
13.Don't blame or resort to whining about another person's behaviour.
14.Express your emotions clearly.
Focus on how you feel rather than saying "you did X, Y, Z."
Polite at Dinner
Polite At Dinner
1. Arrive on time
Your host will be working very hard to serve the dinner hot.
Arriving late will delay the meal and cause some foods to dry up or lose their flavor.
2. Present yourself cleanly and dress well.
Your clothes should make you feel comfortable, but elegant.
Make sure you know the atmosphere and theme.
3. Tell your server how much of the food you want.
Eat only what you can handle.
4. Wait for some signal that the meal is beginning, such as the hostess lifting her fork.
Definitely wait until everyone is seated and served before beginning to eat.
5. Never serve yourself first. Let someone else initiate serving the food
6. Ask politely (by name if possible--don't just announce to the entire table "pass the salt!")
and smile when you need a utensil or other item. Be sure to thank the person who fetches it for you.
7. Talk, but try to keep your voice peaceful and polite.
Importantly, try not to interrupt others; let them talk and show them that you are listening to them with respectful eye contact.
8. Smile at other guests and treat them all well - be polite, peaceful, calm and classy.
9. Practice basic table manners.
Keep your elbows off the table, keep your fingers out of your plate, break small pieces of bread from a roll to butter instead of buttering your whole roll at once, chew with your lips closed, don't scrape your teeth on your fork or spoon, never talk with food in your mouth, always say please and thank you, and use your napkin (which belongs in your lap when you are not using it!)
10 Excuse yourself politely if you need to use the bathroom, or if you burp
11. Thank your host: they will have worked hard to pull it off.
Order in Japanese Restaurant (日本)
Order in Japanese Restaurant (日本)
1. See if the restaurant has an online menu.
If it does, print it off and show it to people you know so they can perhaps explain it to you.
2. Ask about prices.
To do this, you say 'Kore wa ikura desu ka?'
(pronounced korei wa ikura des ka?), which means "How much does this cost?"
3. Learn numbers (so you will understand what they say):
ichi-1 ni-2 san-3 yon-4 go-5 roku-6 nana-7 hachi-8 kyu-9 ju-10 hyaku-100 sen-1000.
4. When you have ordered and received your food,
if you are asked 'Daijobu desu ka?answer 'Hai'.
You were asked 'Is everything ok?' and you replied 'Yes'.
5. Do not pass food between your chopsticks; this looks like you are in a funeral.
If you really have to pass some food, do it discreetly and with the non-eating end of your chopsticks (if they are decorated, this is the decorated end).
6. If you are eating noodles, slurp; it's polite.
7. Don't stick your chopsticks upright in a bowl of rice.
8. Say itadakimasu' before eating; this means "I receive this meal".
9. To express your pleasure at the end of the meal,
say 'Gochisoosama deshita' meaning "It was a feast."
'Oishikata desu'means "It was tasty
Japanese Business Meeting Etiquette (日本)
Japanese Business Meeting
Etiquette (日本)
It is advisable to call 1 - 2 hours prior to a scheduled meeting to confirm that you are on your way.
If you will be late arriving for a meeting then call at least 1 hour in advance to allow the customer to reschedule.
Always arrive 10 minutes early for a meeting, more if the meeting will be with senior executives.
Plan an exact agenda for the meeting - if the Japanese side say the meeting will finish at 4pm then it probably will not be extended because employees and facilities often run on tight schedules.
Wait to be seated in the meeting room because there is a custom regarding which party sits on which physical side of the table .
It is good Japanese business etiquette to take lots of notes - it indicates interest and Japanese are trained during induction to note down everything at meetings.
If you forget a discount that you promised in an early meeting, even a year later the Japanese side will show you the note they made at the time!
If you need a non-disclosure agreement signed send it well in advance of the meeting.
Many companies here do business without written contracts.
If you suddenly slap a non-disclosure agreement on the table at a first meeting, the Japanese side will be embarrassed, probably refuse to sign it until it has been legally reviewed (which can take weeks!) and avoid meeting again.
Don't forget your Japanese business cards!
Gifts Giving with Japanese (日本)
The Art of Gift-Giving.
a guide on exchanging gifts with the Japanese
The Japanese love to give gifts.
This habit is not practiced only on special occasions, but it's widely accepted as giri - a social duty and obligation.
Gift-giving is an accepted practice encountered everyday, from taking a little something to a neighbor to receiving an extra radish from the greengrocer.
If you give someone a gift, you can be sure to receive one in return. And, if you want a gift, you must give one first.
Whenever Japanese friends visited, they always brought something wrapped in pretty paper and glorious bows.
For the Japanese, gift-giving at its finest is a token of appreciation, and at its worst, a competition.
When you return a gift, yours must be better and more expensive.
In turn, the gift you will receive will be better and more expensive than the one you gave.
The value of the gifts increase successively.
The following pointer will guide you to know how and when to give and receive gifts.
Devalue the gift you give.
The important thing is to act and seem humble.
You don't want the recipient to think that you are arrogant or proud.
Denigrate your gift as much as possible.
It doesn't matter if the label on the box bears the symbol for Gucci.
The Japanese value the appearance of a humble gift-giver who tries to shun away from praise.
Praise the gift you receive.
Although praising may seem obvious, overpraising the gift is the key.
It's also important to praise the fine taste of the gift-giver in making that particular choice for you. And don't forget to give a thousand and one thanks.
Don't open the gift unless you are urged to do so.
And when you do, you must take the utmost care in unwrapping it.
Don't look eager, and be careful that you don't tear the paper or cut the ribbon.
After observing, praising, and thanking, be sure to rewrap the gift as if it had never been opened. Try to appear as if you take great pride in the value of the gift.
Humility is valued in Japanese society as a virtue and even as a norm.
Choose perishable/edible gifts.
In general, don't buy things such ornaments, vases, and kitchenware; it's already assumed that everyone has these things.
To do so may imply that you don't approve of the other person's taste.
Also, most Japanese houses are very small and don't have extra space for useless junk.
Offer something perishable or edible.
Some suggestions include fruits, smoked salmon, canned goods, coffee/teas, jars of jam, and oils. Though not as common, fine wine or gourmet bottled drinks are options as well.
Wrap all gifts attractively.
Wrap anything and everything with good-quality paper along with bows and ribbons.
Japanese gift-giving is an art and it should be treated as such.
Look out for the colors when choosing your ribbons.
Red and white are typically used for Valentine's Day, as red and green are for Christmas.
Gold and silver are for weddings.
Be especially careful with black and white - use those colors only for funerals.
Because the Japanese can be quite picky and superstitious, be aware about the implications of certain colors.
Say I am Sorry in Japanese (日本)
How To Say I'm Sorry
In Japanese (日本)
Learning how to offer your apology and ask for forgiveness in Japanese can be very useful when you did or say something bad or harmful to another person by accident.
In such cases you want to say that you're sorry and if it was serious, you should ask them for forgiveness.
The most polite way to say I'm sorry is to say sumimasen.
Sumimasen has many meanings but basically they all mean the same thing.
You can use sumimasen as excuse me too.
Sumimasen. Kore wa ikura desu ka?
Excuse me, how much is this?
Sumimasen!
I'm sorry!
Sumimasen can also be used as thank you.
You usually say sumimasen as a way to politely thank someone for taking the trouble to do something for you.
Another basic Japanese word for offering an apology is Gomen.
Using gomen by itself can be a little informal and not to polite.
To make it sound more polite, you should say gomen nasai.
Gomen nasai. Daijoubu desu ka?
I'm sorry. Are you alright?
(After bumping into someone).
Gomen gomen, kondo harau dakara.
I'm sorry, I will pay you next time.
Gomen kudasai! Dareka imasen ka?
Excuse me! Anyone home?
Another way to casually say I'm sorry is to use the Japanese word warui.
Warui means bad literally. You can think of it as fault.
Suman, ore ga warukatta.
I'm sorry, my bad (it was my fault).
Zenbu omae ga warukatta deshou.
It was all your fault.
See how easy it is to say I'm sorry in Japanese?
As a rule of thumb you will want to use the polite form for people you respect and those who are older than you.
You can use the informal form among your friends or anyone who don't find casual language.See also say thank you in Japanese
http://www.myjapansensei.com
Say Thank you in Japanese (日本)
Say Thank you in Japanese (日本)
"Arigato" can be used only among friends.
It will be rude if you say "Arigato" to a person older than you.
"Arigato gozaimasu" is polite, but it may sound a little too polite.
If you say "Arigato gozaimasu" each time, people may look on you as humbling yourself too much.
"Domo" is a convenient word.
You can say it to whomever you want to thank.
It is not too light or too heavy.
When someone has done something for you, you can say "domo.
" For example, when someone picks up the handkerchief you have dropped, you can say "domo" to him or her.
The speed of saying it is important.
The slower you say it, the more you can express your gratitude and politeness.
When you want to say "Thanks." to your friends, you can say "domo" quickly.
But a quick "domo" is not appropriate when you have, for instance, been helped a lot by others. In that case, you should say slowly, "Ah...Do..mo.."
You should not forget to bow to the person you thank!
Another common expression is "Suimasen" or "Sumimasen."
In textbooks, these are explained as expression for apology.
Yes, it is true.
But you should remember these words are often used for expressing your gratitude.
If you are not confident about controling the speed of saying "domo," it will be safer to use "suimasen" instead, especially when you thank a person older than you.
Some other areas of Japan have their own way to convey the same idea and when you are in Osaka you can use the word ‘ookini’.
Business Card / Name card (Meishi) (日本)
Business Card / Name Card (Meishi) (日本)
Japanese businessmen always exchange name cards, called meishi, when they meet for the first time.
Business cards are such an important tool for conducting business, that good businessman in Japan are supposed to carry business cards neatly placed in a business card case wherever they go .
So be prepared with a box of business cards when you come to Japan.
A bilingual card with one side printed in Japanese is preferable.
Business cards should be offered with both hands while bowing slightly, or first bow and then offer your business card.
Hold your card Japanese - side up and in the way that is readable for the other party (at least ask somebody which way to read).
When handed your business card, Japanese businessmen study it very carefully.
Be sure to have a good translation of titles: That may receive the most attention.
In Japan, you can be lazy by not remembering names, but address the other party by his or her title, like Mr. manager (of course in Japanese) throughout the meeting, which is quite acceptable.
Present your business card while shifting your body weight forward, which demonstrates your eagerness. But don't overdo it.
Some say the Japanese are very title oriented people and the easiest way to find the title is by the business card.
Whatever the reason maybe, come to Japan with lots of name cards and treat the business cards you receive with respect.
Bow to your customers' back (日本)
Bow to your customers' back (日本)
"Bow to your customers' back" is not unique to this company but a prevalent way of thinking in Japan.
Because Japanese believe that our feelings, including the feeling of sincerity, are communicative, even they are not recognized by the recipient.
Say Thank you & Good Bye after company visit (日本)
Say Thank you & Good Bye
after visiting Japanese company - 日本
Sincerity (magokoro in Japanese).
Doing business with the Japanese, showing your sincerity will become a very important element. Indeed the three most favored company mottoes in Japan are "sincerity" "effort" and "harmony".
How you say thank you and good bye after a company visit. When you are visiting a Japanese company and about to leave, it is better not to put on your overcoat, which may be considered arrogant.
(For the same reason, coats should be discarded before approaching the receptionist desk.) You should say thank you and good-bye when you are leaving a meeting room, but things are not over yet.
It is advisable not to put on your coat, even if your Japanese friends insist and even when it is snowing out, unless your hosts also wear coats.
It is better not to start talking with your colleagues about the meeting because your Japanese business friends will most probably be following you, at least to the elevator hall.
When you see your customers off you should bow until they go out of your sight completely. You can get into the elevator after saying "thank you" and "good bye" for the second or third time but still pay attention to those seeing you off and try to bow or at least nod when the elevator door is about to close.
In some cases your business host will escort you to your car. Everybody start bowing when the car sets on motion. So you should bow and say good bye and thank you in small voice.
After you get into the car, roll down the window (or push the button to lower the window) to ensure there is no window to separate you with your host and mumble thank you and good bye, probably for the fifth time by now .
So, you are expected to crane your neck to bow slightly or nod from time to time until you can no longer see them.
See also : Say Sorry in Japanese
